People You Don’t Know Are Beyond Your Control and Influence…

Expanding Your Influence

The people closest to you are those that are most easily influenced by you but it’s hard to imagine having any influence on people you don’t know.

There is a very common teaching that utilizes a simple diagram sometimes with circles to demonstrate the limitations of personal control, and influence. Specifically to illustrate that there are forces around us over which we have no control or influence.

I’ve seen this lesson in the context of spiritual, emotional, educational and professional environments but typically the focus is narrow and based upon the objective at hand. For the most part that area drawn to emphasize the people, situations and circumstances that we face over which we have no control or influence, is only used to help direct attention to what we can control and influence.

Setting The Stage

The purpose of this narrative is to examine that outer area, the one which the instructor warns us against trying to exercise control over. However, before we can go there we need to revisit what we can control and what we can influence.

Here’s the short list of what we can control:
1.    Our thoughts and words
2.    Our reactions
3.    Our attitudes
4.    Our decisions

This is the short list of what we can influence:
1.    People who look to us for direction (typically children)
2.    People who look to us for instruction (peers and subordinates)
3.    People who look to us for inspiration (remember this one!)
4.    Our personal comfort or sense of fulfillment

What Lies Beyond

The most common examples you face of that grey area over which you’re helpless to exercise your control or influence are (1) unforeseen circumstances and (2) people you don’t know.

From a practical application we are taught not to submit our emotions (something we control) to the outcome of unfortunate circumstances. Successful people look forward to these obstacles because they’ve already learned that personal growth is always accelerated by that which challenges us.

From an entrepreneurial perspective we become fascinated by the second example; people we don’t know. All business growth is hinged upon moving people from that area beyond our influence to where we can start the process of building a relationship.

Unraveling The Mysterious Patterns Around Us

True innovation continuously looks beyond what it presently reaches with a passion to touch more. In the example of Facebook, what struck the creator as a potential billion dollar business still hasn’t finished exploding.
Sometimes studying the patterns at work around us inspires an ad that will attract a small amount of interest. Sometimes new business ventures are simply overwhelmed by a seemingly innocuous phrase that goes viral.

The formula should look like this:
1.    Well defined need or solution our business can satisfy
2.    Who needs it most and where are they looking for it?
3.    Who would love to discover it seemingly by accident and…
4.    Where would they feel most comfortable doing so?

What Social Media Has Provided

Beyond the continuous blather of everything your friends did today, the voices in social media offer true insight to exactly what matters to people. The expansion of your social network exposes you to patterns that you may not have been exposed to normally.

In order to accomplish the same type of research by any other means is suddenly impractical both for the expense and time involved. Social media takes you directly into the heartbeat and emotional state of just about any experience you can imagine.

It becomes the passion of the social media manager to get in and get out after acquiring the answers they needed from a trustworthy and reliable source. Quietly unlocking the patterns allows you to reach into that mass of society, the people you don’t know and build a bridge into the online business world over which you do have influence.

The people you don’t know are vital to your business and while you can’t know and have a close personal relationship with everyone of them, you should develop a professional relationship with all of them. If you find this information helpful please share it with your friends and leave us your thoughts.